ID Cards U Turn

wanker001Alan Johnson, the Home Secretary has backed down over the compulsory introduction of ID cards. Mr Johnson said: “Holding an identity card should be a personal choice for British citizens – just as it is now to obtain a passport.

“Accordingly I want the introduction of identity cards for all British citizens to be voluntary and I have therefore decided that identity cards issued to airside workers, planned initially at Manchester and London City airports later this year, should also be voluntary.”

Amusingly on BBC 4 it was reported that Alan Johnson wanted to scrap the ID card scheme. However the Prime Minister wouldn’t let him. About time we got rid of this shower of cheating, lying, oxygen stealing fucking twats from power.

Michael Jackson Jokes

skeletor_byJimWirtThere have been quite a few jokes about MJ since his death, most of them seem to be recycled old jokes, but there have been a few very funny jokes.

Upon hearing the news of Michael Jackson’s death, mourning fans released a white dove in his honour. Well, it was actually a blackbird, but with a rare skin condition…

Apparently Gary Glitter has offered to take on some of Michael Jacksons dates in August, specifically Jaydon (13) Keith (11) and Roydan (9) with the option on several others.

Michael Jackson and Farrah Fawcett, in their own different ways, helped young boys masturbate for years!

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Jackson invented Moonwalk?

Just in case anyone thinks that Whacko Jacko invented the moonwalk, the Manakin Bird got there first, probably followed by Marcel Marceau, James Brown did something similar in The Blues Brothers and Jeffrey Daniel performed a variation of the moonwalk in Shalamar’s “A Night To Remember” on Top of the Pops in 1982, at least a year before Whacko Jacko. Enjoy the video clip. It is very funny.

V Funny Jacko Posts

skeletor_byJimWirtOver on the Daily Mail Website, there are some wags, there are a couple of very funny posts about Michael Jackson’s death. Well I think that the are amusing.
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I’m very sad, his music was great. When I was younger, he touched me in so many special ways.
– Bubbles, Los Angeles, 26/6/2009 12:38

So very sad. The most important thing the effect his music has, he touched me deep inside when I was very young. RIP.
– Bobbie, Wetwang England, 26/6/2009 12:36

OK that is enough now, I am bored with this constant reporting of his death, it has been none stop since about 2300hrs yesterday. There are even reporters claiming that it will effect Glastonbury, what bollox, he was not expected to perform there!

Whacko Whacks It

Jackson in London Whacko Jacko finds the easy way out from doing 50 tour dates at the O2 arena, rather than give it large on stage, he wimps out by dying. Ta Ta Michael, I was a big fan of your music, if only you hadn’t gone mental, you might have still been with us.

There have already been a few funny jokes circulating.

Reports of Michael Jackson dying of a massive heart attack at home are incorrect, he was actually in the childrens ward, having a stroke.

What is the difference between Michael Jackson and Alex Ferguson? Ferguson will still be playing Giggs in August.

nice-jacksonApparently on hearing the news of Michael Jackson’s death Bubbles has gone ape and Uri has gone on another bender!